A different way to have a discussion

Even as I am preparing to return home, my eyes are still continually being opened to the differences in cultures. I had noticed early in my living here that Ghanaians in general seem to be much more vocal and animated in their discussions than I am used to or prefer. At first it really bothered me and I was convinced that I would be seeing tons of fist fights but that isn't what happens. The only thing close to a fight I have seen involved road rage. A big slow truck was in front of us during rush hour on a major road when all of a sudden a huge guy jumps out of his car and charges the driver of the truck. The mad man (literally:)) opened the driver's door and attempted to drag him out of the truck. When this didn't work, he alternately hit him and pulled at him. It was unbelievable. And the truck driver was several years his senior! The only thing that stopped the mad man from really hurting him was that the truck wasn't in park and so as the older man is trying to protect himself his foot must have come off the brake and the truck is rolling back ward - toward us. Fortunately a guy in a car next to the commotion had gotten out and I think would have intervened at some point but ended up hollering at the men that the truck was rolling. That seemed to distract the mad man enough that the truck driver closed his door, stopped the truck from rolling and actually started moving as the light had turned green. I don't know what happened after that but it was quite an experience to see. I am so thankful the older man wasn't hurt.

Oh, but I seriously digressed. So back to my original reason for writing this. The other day I had to go get more passport size pictures taken for my visa for Liberia. It is at a little place just down the road from my house. The inside of the building is a beauty shop and the "photography" part is on the front porch. As I am sitting and waiting for the man to come and take the pictures, I am witness to a discussion between a man and a woman at the shop next door. Now if I had seen this early on it would have really disturbed me but I am used to it now and was able to watch with detached interest. The woman is really worked up. She is standing and the man is sitting. She is pacing around, talking extremely loud, waving her arms, bending over close to the man's face and her face is scrunched up in what appears to be anger. I mean she has a point to make and make it she will! At first I am thinking "wow, this woman is seriously angry" and of course they are talking in Twi so I am only catching a rare word. After several minutes of her apparent tirade, the man talks and suddenly they are both laughing and slapping five. Then she continues on with her "tirade". It was so weird to my western eyes. The lady sitting across from me on the porch turns and gets involved in the conversation. Also a very common thing here that doesn't seem to bother anyone at all. Privacy and personal space are viewed in a very different way than in the US. Here there is very little of either. In the states, we guard both with our lives - practically. Anyway, so now all three are in the discussion. It appears to be a religious conversation as I occasionally hear the word "Muslim" and "church". After several minutes of loud and animated discussion it appears to be over and all three people are laughing and smiling and seem to move on to talking about something else. As I said above, if I had seen this when I first got here I would have been very disturbed and probably would have left. But after watching this for almost a year, I can sit and not be bothered by it. It is just the way most people here communicate. When they are passionate about a subject, they are loud and demonstrative and everyone seems to talk at once. And even if they are angry, I don't see people walking away or shutting down. They talk - or holler- it out and then they are fine and carry on with life. I have seen this on the street, in the neighborhood, etc. Really interesting and so different from how most people I know handle conflict. I have learned to be able to sit in the midst of it and not get so bothered. Of course it might be different if I am actually involved in the conflict but at least some growth has occurred in just being able to sit in the presence of it and not be so bothered by it.

Oh and by the way my passport picture was taken on the porch, with a lady standing behind me holding a white sheet behind my head and the photographer taking the picture two feet or so from my face. It was a Polaroid type camera and about 2 minutes and 4 Ghana cedis later I had 4 little passport sized pictures of my face. These relatively crude little shops are awesome and really convenient. I will miss that in the states.

To paint you a little picture, in a 5-6 block radius from my house I can get passport pictures taken, go to a pharmacy, go to 3-4 little "grocery" type stores, get fresh fruits and vegetables, get a taxi, phone cards, get my bike repaired (if I had one), get a pedicure and go to a Ghanaian restaurant for chicken and rice. All these things are in mom and pop type stores and are within a very easy walking distance from my house. No need to jump in the car, fight traffic and go to the store for the eggs that I forget (almost every time) for the cookies I am making. I just walk across the road and there they are - fresh eggs at the little store. There are very few chain type stores here. Most things are sold at these roadside shacks and the prices are so much better than at the bigger stores. It is a neat way to buy things and I will miss that.

Has anyone else noticed how I start writing about one subject and segue - or just abruptly shift- into another one? I guess now that my mind is uncluttered from the stress of the last few months my thoughts are flowing freely. Thanks for hanging in there with me as I let the thoughts and words pour out in several directions.