Sundays are really hard for me.

Today is the one month "anniversary" of my coming to Ghana. I arrived on Sunday, May 20th. I have discovered in the last month that Sunday is the hardest day of the week for me. Monday through Friday I might have moments where I struggle with being homesick or lonely or longing for what is familiar and on Saturday it all increases a bit, but Sunday those feelings and struggles are magnified and prolonged. The most obvious reason is that I miss my church. And it is hard to break into a new church in the states much less in a foreign country. I love most everything about my church in IL - the music, the worship, the sermons, working in the nursery, having my parents there and so many wonderful friends. Today has been especially hard even though I went to a new church here and enjoyed it quite a bit. All the thoughts of home and feeling alone and different and uncomfortable in a new place have crashed in at the same time today. Leaving me with tears and a headache. Maybe part of it is also that it is Father's Day and those of you who know my Dad know that he is something special and I miss him. I miss my mom too. She has been so strong with me and for me. I miss them today. I miss my good, close friends. I miss my mom's beautiful garden and "my birds". I miss the forest preserve where I often sit and write and read and pray. And yes, I miss NASCAR on TV but not as much as the rest:) I hope that the reality of what I am feeling doesn't scare you. It used to scare me to have such strong, negative feelings but over the last couple of years I have come to recognize the truth that feelings will not kill me. They hurt and I don't like some of them but they will not kill me. So I hope you are ok with me sharing the reality of living in and adjusting to a new culture. It is hard. I stick out like a sore thumb. I am most definitely a minority here and that is an unusual and uncomfortable place for me. As I wrote to my mom in an email earlier, I feel like I am in shifting sand. And sometimes shifting quicksand. Everything is new and different and I don't have any of the things or places or people that I would go to to find comfort and help. But as I wrote to her earlier all I could think of was that God is the Solid Rock. Do you know the chorus of this hymn? "On Christ the solid Rock I stand. All other ground is shifting sand. All other ground is shifting sand." Everything is shifting sand. And when all the usual props have been kicked out there isn't much to hold on to but Jesus. That's where I am now. Where I must focus. Another song comes to mind that says "You've got to hold on to God's unchanging hand." My whole life has changed in one plane ride but the Lord hasn't moved. The verse at the top tells it straight out. Is. 44:8 Do not tremble and do not be afraid; Have I not long since announced it to you and declared it? And you are My witnesses. Is there any God besides Me,Or is there any other Rock? I know of none.' As you read this post please pray for me - that I would hold on to the Rock. The only Rock that is the same yesterday, today and forever. Thank you!